You may be thinking, why does she keep writing about confidence? Why does this even matter? Well, the truth is I've noticed a trend lately with many of my clients. When I receive feedback from them, one of the common themes in how they transform through coaching with me is by growing in confidence and often in confidence they didn't know they needed.
I believe it to be a key ingredient to your success
So what can confidence do for you?
Reduce Fear and Anxiety
The greatest enemy of progress is fear. However, one thing that you have to understand is that building your confidence plays a very significant role in offering a calming effect. It simply quiets the gremlin inside your head that tries to convince you that you are not good enough. It is through the confidence that you can effectively unhook from your thoughts and act by your standards and values.
Have you ever experienced low self-confidence in the past? Are you still struggling with low self-confidence? If yes, then there is a high likelihood that you already have experienced rumination many times. Rumination simply refers to the tendency to replay worries and perceived mistakes over and over again. When rumination is occurring too frequently, this is linked to anxiety and even in extreme cases; depression.
This is something that can cause you to withdraw from the entire world around you. However, when you fill your tank with confidence, there is special energy that springs from within you and acts by breaking the cycle of negative thinking so that your inner critic is silenced.
Achieve Greater Desire To Take Action
Building confidence is not something that you can achieve overnight. It is a continuous process that needs lots of small steps which leave a strong sense of lasting accomplishment. Well, it is more like learning a new language, or being on a weight loss program, or even overcoming an obstacle. Think of it a mastering a new skill.
Do you remember something you did in life that gave you a deep sense of accomplishment? Graduating from college, climbing a tree, learning how to ski, winning an award, anything that you are proud of. One thing that you will notice is that those achievements did not happen overnight. They must have taken time and lots of perseverance. If you can triumph through tough situations and adversities, then you definitely can duplicate the same grit and tenacity to other areas of your life.
As your level of confidence continues to grow little by little, you will find that your self-drive is stretched and your abilities become deeply rooted and impeccable. The good thing is that even in the wake of these thoughts, the self-assurance within you will render these thoughts paralyzed rather than the other way round.
In other words, the voices that tell you may not make it will be silenced by the wide grin on your face saying what if I make it! When you start to see progress, you will feel energized.
Increase Resilience
When you have confidence, you are well equipped to cope with anything that happens in your life. Even when faced with harsh setbacks and failures, you simply hold your head up, and shoulders pushed back, and you give it another try. Trust me, even the most confident people in the world fail. So, this does not mean that when you have self-confidence, you will never fail. It simply means that you will not stay down, beat yourself up, or become crippled by them. You will brace yourself and rise to the challenge of giving it another try.
Confidence will allow you to push yourself to try new techniques, approaches, and means to make your dreams a reality. In other words, when you fail or make a mistake, you will learn that they are a part of the learning curve. Only through mistakes we can grow into a stronger version of ourselves. It simply means that you will accept failure knowing that it is part of life.
Studies have shown that ironically, when you are willing to fail, you will become more successful. The main reason behind this is that you are not expecting that everything will be 100% perfect. Instead, when you take more shots, you can only get better.
Improve Relationships
This may sound a little counterintuitive. However, one thing that I have learned over the years is that the more confidence you cultivate, the less self-centered you become. Imagine yourself walking into a room full of people, when everyone is paying attention to the speaker, and then there you come in to take a seat. Often times, you’ll feel awkward and think that people are staring at you. Well, 90% of the time people will just take a glance and pay no attention at you afterwards. They are all wrapped up in their thoughts or what the speaker is talking about that nothing happening outside their zone of focus matters at all.
Confidence wipes out the feeling that you need to make a lasting impression on people, and you find yourself flowing with the crowd and enjoying every bit of your interaction. You will not be caught up in a moment of trying to compare yourself with others. You simply sink into a relaxed state that puts everyone else at ease and hence helping you connect deeper.
Studies have also shown that having unshakeable confidence breeds empathy. The truth is, when you are less confident, all your thoughts are roaming around thinking of what people might be thinking. However, when you are confident, you are comfortable in your true identity, and your thoughts are fully present in the moment. Instead of letting the external environment affects your internal dialogue, you divert the attention elsewhere and focus on things that truly matter at the moment. Simply put, you do not get preoccupied with self-doubt. You reach out and lift others.
Experience A Stronger Sense Of Your Authenticity
It is only confidence that can unleash your full potential. This is when you easily accept your weaknesses and failures with the knowledge that these shortcomings do not change your true sense of self-worth. Instead, you appreciate the fact that you have strengths you can celebrate even amid all adversities and hence, are empowered to use them fully. In other words, unshakeable confidence is what helps align your actions with your values, principles, and standards. This, in turn, offers you a superior sense of purpose.
Confidence opens you up to self-discovery so that you can appreciate who you truly are and what you represent. When you see anything that is not right, you have the courage to show up, stand up, and raise your voice over the issue. You effortlessly allow your best self to shine through.

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